Adjusting to a new normal after your divorce should be thought of as a marathon, not a sprint. Divorce is, after all, a major life event, similar to the death of a loved one. And, post-divorce, you are mourning the loss of your previous life.
Expecting you to be your normal self weeks, months, or even years after the ordeal is not setting realistic expectations for yourself. Through time and following these five tips, you can eventually embrace your new life and thrive.
- Allow yourself time to grieve. Some people make the mistake of mischaracterizing divorce as something else besides a major loss. The truth is, many divorcees will experience the five stages of grief after a divorce: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. The time it takes to grieve will vary wildly based on the amicability of your divorce, whether or not you were the one to file the divorce petition, time spent being married, and countless other factors. It’s possible for your grief to wax and wane over time, as well. Take your time with this one.
- Find healthy ways to cope with your emotions. If you don’t find healthy and productive ways to deal with your emotions, they can come out in unhealthy and destructive ways. Exercise is one of the most effective activities to let out negative energy. Drawing or painting is also known to help individuals process and channel their feelings after a divorce.
- Write or journal your thoughts. Writing is similar to drawing in that it allows you a healthy medium to express your emotions. If creative writing doesn’t sound like your cup of tea, then find 10 minutes at the beginning or end of the day to jot down your thoughts and emotions in a journal. Journaling can also be useful in assessing the progress you’ve been making since your divorce was finalized.
- Embrace change. Divorce or not, everyone’s lives are destined for change. After a divorce, you will have time to chase other pursuits. For example, you could seek that professional certificate or accreditation you’ve always been curious about. Alternatively, you could resume old hobbies or pastimes that fell by the wayside during your marriage. It can be hard to remember how you spent time before marriage, so don’t be afraid to pick up some new hobbies – especially if it surrounds you with new people.
- Join a support group. By nature, humans are social beings who crave community and belonging. The stigma around needing talk therapy is slowly dissolving, so today is as good a time as ever to seek support while processing your divorce. Another modern benefit is that the internet has made it extremely easy to connect with people going through the same thing you are. The things you’re feeling after your divorce are heavy; you shouldn’t feel like you have to deal with them by yourself.
Another factor that can play heavily into your mental and emotional recovery after your divorce is your choice of attorney to help guide you through the process. Divorce and Mediation Law Firm is singularly focused on helping those going through divorce get through the legal process as efficiently and with as little stress as possible.
We would be honored to represent you during a difficult time in your life. To set up a free, confidential consultation with one of our attorneys, call us at (954)-447-2580 today. Your better future awaits.